Sometimes I just get so disillusioned…. by everything. Love, friendship, career, family.. bonds between people, kindness, sincerity, connection.. are any of it real? Does any of it last? Is it worth pursuing? Is it worth fighting for? Is it worth the sacrifice?
I feel so tired. Fed up. Burnt out.
The kind of feeling you get when you put so much effort into something.. only to find that it all amounted to nothing.. and you have to start over again.
Only… I don’t have the energy to start again. And even if I did, I don’t want to anymore. Because the first time started with a fresh, strong, unwounded heart. This time, it’s bleeding. And bleeding hearts don’t make strong hearts.
I give up.
Maybe it’s admitting defeat. It will take a while for me to lick my wounds and heal.
But though it looks like I’m retreating… really.. all I’m trying to do.. is move forward.
No comments:
Post a Comment