Some Hearts

Hi there,

I don’t really have anything worthy to say tonight. I just wanted to sit and listen to myself type and see what comes out.

I’m alone. I could go home, but I just don’t want to yet. I want to sit here, and here the sound of my keyboard as I type this words out. I say that, but actually what I’m really doing is listening to myself think.

I think it’s my perpetual need for solitude every now and then. I need it as much as I need the company and love of people around me. I always feel the need to be loved and wanted. I suspect we all do. But I also feel the need to be alone sometimes. This I know, not everyone will fully understand.

It’s peaceful, and almost joyous in a way. To have a quiet moment and time to yourself. A sort of serenity descends on me when there is quietness and no one is around and I am free to do exactly what I’m doing now. Writing out whatever comes to mind.

People have been writing diaries and personal journals for ages. And I think by now I understand intimately just way. Those who write are often reflective and pensive people. Those who write often have a thirst for truth, not just on the outside but also on the inside. People who write often dig into the inner most parts of their psyche and heart for the truth. Because they know that unless confronted, our hearts hide, mask or deny the truth rather than reveal it. Because revealing truth is often painful.

I realize that though all of us have hearts made of flesh and blood, not all are the same. Some of hearts that are strong, courageous, unyielding, unbending, and able to withstand all sorts of attacks, knowing not the definition of fear. Others have hearts that falter so easily, they get frightened and the fire in them gets squashed out with little resistance. But I have seen also seen some hearts; small as they are, weak as they may be, strive and persevere and refuse to be beaten. Hearts that have a fire can be dimmed, but refused to be put out.

I realize that the strongest people I’ve known are not the people who dare face everything the world has in store for them, but the people who dare face the things that manifest in their hearts. Because when you take a closer look, it’s not the former but the latter that is the hardest to confront.

Good night friend. I hope you are well.

From
Me