A wonderous moment of bliss......

As we reached the park.. the rain seemed to slow down.

"Thank you God!'...I whispered to myself.

There weren't too many lights, so the place was a bit dark. The air felt cool and moist. At least it wasn't hot and sticky. We got out of the car and started walking.. Her fingers automatically slide between mine as I reach out my hand, no words, no gestures needed; one of those things we just can read off each other after so many years of being together.

We walked slowly, not saying too much.. just enjoying each other's company... a comfortable silence. I lead her on to the spot we had first met..

********************

Back when we were both 16. We were from different schools.. There was this environmental awareness programme being organized by an NGO for schools around the Klang valey.. and we had each been chosen by our schools respectively to participate. I was soOo close to not going. The night before, my friends and I were hooked on the television, watching the Champions League semi finals... where Bayern Munich beat Man Utd to advance into the finals. We were up until 4a.m. cheering on our team.. albeit in vein since they lost anyway. The 4 of us actually contemplated not going. Our team had lost.. We were in bad moods and we wanted to sleep. Who wants to be spending their day climbing up a hill and talking about recycling and saving mother earth when your team just lost anyway.... But for the sake of our beloved English teacher, whom we were all very fond of, we dragged our lazy asses and puffy eyes along.

We were split into groups.. and as luck would have it.. I got placed into the same group with the only other chinese girl in the whole event. And as the host shouted out "OK everyone, now turn around and introduce yourself to the person behind you...." I could not believe my luck as I stood there right behind her.

"Hi... I'm XXX" she said.

"Hi..... I'm YYY. OMG, you speak English!!" I said (rather stupidly actually)

"Erm...... YeeeEess?" she answers half puzzled

"Oh no... I mean.. that's great! It's really nice to have someone to speak to in English for a change." I said.

Back from where I was from.. very little people spoke English. Everything was either in Malay, or Mandarin or Cantonese.. I missed having someone to speak to in my primary language... so speaking to her was quite a joy.. The fact that she was so pretty was also a plus point!

I must have sounded so lame to her for making such comments.. but thankfully, we hit it off real quick.. and before long... we were so engrossed in conversation with each other that we pretty much neglected everyone else in the group. When we started our way up the hill, we were in front of the line.. By the time we were down again at the foot of the hill.. we were one of the last. She had shared with me all the hardships she had faced in her life... her broken home, her missing mother, her estranged father, her junkie brother, and her abandoned younger brother living in a shelter home. I was blown away. Not by pity.. not by sadness..but by admiration. I thought I HAD had it bad.. but the things she was telling me was far beyond what I ever experienced. And there she was, happy and cheerful and as normal as everyone else.

I never believed in love at first sight, and if you ask me today, I'd still tell you the same thing. It doesn't exist. Love is nurtured and build.. not something you fall into. But I DO know that from the fateful first day I met her, I have been crazy about this girl ever since. I didn't know then that it would be the start of something new that would shape the rest of my life, I didn't know that this woman would be the one I would want to marry.. And I didn't know that this would be the spot I was going to propose. Life suddenly seemed stranger than fiction.

****************************

We sat down at a chair as the rain started to tinkle down again. She was a full grown woman now. More beautiful than she has ever been. Back when, very early on in our relationship, I started calling her beautiful.. almost every single day.

"I'm not beautiful dear.. Only you say that." she would tell me...

"Well... ONE DAY, people are going to start noticing you... and they'll start being very sweet and nice to you.. and call you beautiful... When THAT day comes..... just remember... I said it first..... Long before anyone else had eyes to see, I already did.. Remember that OK?"

That day had arrived.... and yes.. she remembered.

There were some annoying groups of people that came by, making noises.. chatting.. playing games in the park...She was uneasy and wanted to leave... but I said "NO, lets stay.. We CAME HERE FIRST. THEY SHOULD LEAVE, NOT US".

I was guarding the place like a jealous pit bull...I was not leaving my spot, not now, not tonight, not on this occasion.. My heart was racing... racing sooo hard. I had not felt this nervous or anxious for a long long time. 7 years to be exact.... when I nervously grabbed her and and asked her to be my girlfriend. The same nervousness.. the same fear.. the same anticipation. But I was also 7 years older, 7 years wiser, and 7 years in preparation for the question I was about to ask. This time, I was asking her hand in marriage. I had done it in the spur of the moment back then.. This time, I had meticulously planned everything.

I had avoided hugging her the whole night. I didn't want her to feel the ring. I gently felt it.. It was still there.. so was the other crucial thing.. the piece of paper. But not just any paper. The scrap piece of paper I had messily scribbled my proposal on while sitting in the car.. After I bought the ring. For once in my life, I had planned ahead of time what I wanted to wear. The jacket was the only thing that could safely hide these two items. I used to write her simple short poems.. and she loved it. Sometimes she would take out the old ones and read them over and over again. I always felt they were rather crude and elementary.. But she thought it was sweet... And she started to comment when they got lesser and lesser. (I can't be inspired all the time!)... I remembered that.., and suddenly, all the pieces just came together. I had figured out the when; on our 7th anniversary. 7 is considered a perfect number. I had figured out the where; the place we met.. And finally, with some inspiration, I had figured out the how; through a poem I would pen for her.

I waited and waited and waited till there was no one else around...

"It's about time. It's now or never. " I thought to myself. I never felt so nervous going through the next few lines... trying to lead the conversation into my true intentions.

"Sorry I didn't buy you anything for our anniversary dear.."

"It's OK darling.. Dinner was lovely.... You don't need to buy me anything. I had a good time."

"Ya la.. Well.. no money ma recently.. You know how you always complain that I never write you poems anymore?"

"YeeeEees"

"Well.. since I didn't buy you anything, I wrote you a poem instead. You want me to read it to you?..."

"REALLY!! So sweet.. Faster faster!!" I could see the sparkle in her eyes....

"OK, OK... But I'm a bit shy.. So you look in front.. You musn't look at me while I'm reading it OK? Promise.." Truth was... I didn't want her seeing me reach into my pocket and opening the ring.

"OK, OK.. Faster!!" as she looks away. I love seeing her all excited and happy.

"Alright.. here goes" As I reach into my pocket and took out the scribbled piece of paper...

DEEP BREATH.... TAKE IT SLOWLY

I started reading (don't laugh OK.. I'm just an engineer, not a poet)

*******************

Dear,

Seven long years it has been,

Seems just like yesterday, holding your hand gave me butterflies,

Never could have planned, never would have bet,

The way it all came together, the somehow.. we magically met.

So beautiful you were (and still are!), lovely eyes, infectious smile,

No matter how bad things were, I always knew it was worth while.

Sure, you may think others are prettier, slimmer or smarter,

But, given a choice, I'd still have no other.

Through the peaks and valleys we have been,

So aching the hard times, so sweet and dreamy the good times seem,

I know at times, you just want to throw it all away,

Our fights get so bad, surely this was more than just a bad day!

Yet, here we are today, still together firm and true,

My heart is all yours, is there anything at all I wouldn't do for you?

Such a warm and loving partner, with a caring heart,

More than ever, I don't think we should ever be apart!

Here we are , at the place it all began,

Where fate seems to have guided my hand to your hand,

In my heart, I KNOW... we were meant to be.

But darling......... I still need to ask.........."Will you..... marry me?"

*******************

I ended the last 2 lines holding the ring in my hand at her. She just took one quick glance at it and hugged me tight and said "YES".... bursting in tears. Tears that sounded more like tears of relief more than tears of joy....

"I never expected it would be this way.. I never expected it would be this way........." she says in between sobs....... Gosh, I love her...... The joy and relief finally setting in. I had done it. I'd give myself a pat in the back.... but I was too busy holding her tight.

After she had calmed down.. I took the ring out of the box. This was the moment of truth after playing guessing for an entire week......I gently held her finger and slid the ring in. She covered her mouth with the other hand... A perfect fit.

"It's beautiful. How did you know to buy gold? Most people would've gone for white gold..."

I looked at her and smiled.. "I just knew...."

We just sat there.. in each others arms.. She resting on my shoulder... as I kissed her on the head, I knew in my heart, that this was the kind of moment.. the kind of feeling that only came to people.. mostly once in their life... and many times, hardly in the ways they hoped or expected it to be. I never want to forget that feeling.. that feeling of being the happiest person alive....

This date, this place, this woman... has changed my life...

I had proposed... and she had said yes.... I closed my eyes.. savouring this wondrous moment of bliss.