When Left to His Own Devices...

I'm starting to remember how it feel like being on my own.

8 years of being in a full time relationship tends to make you forget how it feels like to decide what to do with you time, all the time. You get used to this mode of planning things together, giving in there, going along there. Relationships are often dictated by how well you compromise with each other. When it's just you, there is no compromising to do. There's no need to give in. In fact, there is no giving to do at all. You do what you want, go where you want, when you want. With relationships, you're always giving. You give and you give even when you think you can't give anymore, you still do.

Anyway, I digress.

I realize I'm doing exactly the same things I used to do before I was ever in a relationship. I bring my guitar along with me these days, especially when I travel. I grab it and play a few chords every other night. It feels nice listening to the sound of the guitar. It's not a Sony Walkman or an Apple iPod. Just me strumming simple songs to myself, but I'm happy anyway. Just don't ask me to play a song for you.

I read again; Readers Digest, Men's Health Magazine, The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman, CLEO magazine (don't ask)..... anything and everything really, as long as it's good. I owe my command of English to reading. Honest to God, I still don't know what the heck is a verb or noun, I don't know it means to have present or past or perfect participle and I don't intend to ever find out. Learning the rules of a language doesn't make you better at it, just more correct. And in this age obsessed with political correctness, nothing you say will be correct anyway. So why bother?

Lastly, I write. Come to think of it, I officially started writing when I was 14 years old. I bought myself a hard case diary with a lock on it. It was meant for me to write all my deepest darkest thoughts, secret crushes and other assorted infatuations. I still keep it actually. In my first entry, I wrote a description about the ideal girl for me. Sweet, kind, gentle, soft spoken. My perfect love; I had her pictured so clearly in my head. When I did finally fall absolutely head over heels in love with someone, she turned out to be nothing like what I wrote. Just goes to show what we know eh? Anyway, that passion eventually manifested into this blog & my old one, which I have said for the millionth time, I'm incredibly shy & tight lipped about. The funny thing here is, when writing, I totally assume no one is reading this. But when I finally click publish, I totally wish someone would drop a freaking comment. Weird eh? I have thought about making my blog known to every Ah Chong, Muthusamy & Ahmad before.... but I'm still mulling over it. We'll see.


So what does a guy like me do when left to his own devices? 

Music, words and more words.

Damn, I'm such a bore. :-S