Monday, July 26, 2010

A Crappy Day




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I think I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today. I'm feeling like crap. And when I'm feeling like crap.. I like listening to songs like these.. to sort of sooth myself. Something about the deep, low tone of the celo combined with the piano gliding through the notes and the singer singing passionately yet in such a nonchalant kind of way... calms me down.

I'm know a lot of people think acting like you know how to enjoy jazz music is a bit highbrow. But I just like how it sounds, that's all. I don't really know a lot about jazz except that some (like this one) sounds oh-so-awesome... and some just like their making stuff up and trying to make it look deliberate.

Anyway... on this crappy Monday afternoon.. when everything seems to just seem that bit off key, I don't want to talk about what happened. I don't want to talk about who pissed me off. I don't want to talk about what's wrong. I just want to lie in bed, listen to my music, stare at my phone and pretend that through sheer willpower, the right person is going to call and ask me how I am.

And for a change, I'd like to be completely selfish in that conversation. I'd like for that person to be totally unconcerned about themselves and listen to what I have to say. For me to rant and vent for a change. I'd want to bitch on and on and on about the this idiot and that moron, this annoying thing and that stupid thing. And at the end of it all.. I'd just want that person to say "Hey.. it's OK, you're just having a bad day. Let me buy you dinner OK?" And I will smile and in my heart, it will already start feeling like perhaps the day wasn't totally crappy after all.

SIGH............

Me and my silly talk. I annoy even myself sometimes.

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